I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
you have failed as an in class drinking partner.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
