im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
Randomize
