So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
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