just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
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