i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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