I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
