What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
He was supposed to visit me tonight but he decided to stop in Tacoma so now I'm sitting on my bed naked eating oranges and candy corn while I watch Parks and Rec.
Now I have to hook up with him tomorrow DURING THE DAY.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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