Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Randomize
