I want to stick my p in your. b.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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