Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
