I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
coming down from speed on a 5 hour flight home from vegas is not a valid reason for calling off work the next day
so i said i had a yeast infection
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
