Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Randomize
