About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I just noticed that when I sneeze...my nipples get hard.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
