it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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