Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
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