Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
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