Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
