I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Randomize