I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
