the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I love having hate sex.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
