He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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