That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Randomize
