We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
So here I am, sexting at work.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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