are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
