i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Everyone is a disappointment when you lose your virginity to nine inches
There are leaves in my underwear?
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