So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
dude thats like the second time shes peed on the couch at a party. we cant invite her anymore
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Randomize
