So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
