Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
