Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
