You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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