Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
Randomize
