Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize