love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
