let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
sarcasm needs its own font
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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