Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Randomize