I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Randomize
