I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
Randomize
