No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
My friends son got stung by a jellyfish over the weekend and we seriously stood there debating on whether or not we should pee on this toddler.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
