Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
A homeless man walked up to me at the bar, pointed, and told me to get my shit together. Jesus?
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Randomize
