new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
Randomize
