I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
it was like eating out sand paper
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
Randomize
