Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
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