redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
