You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I'm going to write a horror movie. It's going to be called "Fat People on a Squeaky Bed" and it's going to feature me laying in bed last night listening to my overweight roommate and her fat boyfriend tossing and turning all night
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
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