For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
