remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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