and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
