Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Randomize
