i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
