I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
