how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
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