I hate your face
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
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