yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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